Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize