Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Also, beer. Big fan.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
