your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
