Well douche your snatch and let's go!
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
this boner is exhausting
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I just want nice things and good sex
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
