Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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