didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
