Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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