clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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