Having a random hookup so left but love u
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
