Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
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