Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
