i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
