3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
