we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
