He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize