i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
