i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
