she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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