His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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