New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
