i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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