Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
These tits shall not be calmed
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
