He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
