i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize