I want to walk on stilts...naked
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
