no. you can't hotbox the world.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
