and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
