I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Sober January is a disaster.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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