ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
