Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
