My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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