Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Randomize
