Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
