Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
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