i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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