She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
