So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
