It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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