If i come over, it means nothing
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
