Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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