I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
