I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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