I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I touched a dick in church today
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
