I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
