I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
