Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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