No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
