i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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