I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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