an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize